Dear Jameson, Alexa, Jeremy, Logan, and mostly Mackenzi,
There's a reason we all still love (and watch) Friends.
It was just a show about 6 people in their early 20s. And. Yet. It was never just a show about 6 people in their early 20s.
Matthew Perry was 54. Jennifer Anniston is 54. We’re the same age.
When Friends was a weekly ritual - sandwiched between Seinfeld and ER - I lived with 7 of my favorite humans in a gross, cigarette smoke infested house. As Friends goes, we were the OG.
We would gather in Carrie’s back bedroom to watch our friends Rachel, Phoebe, Monica, Chandler, Joey and Ross while getting ready for a Bloomington Thursday night.
I love those people. And 30 years ago, 54 felt very far away.
But 30 years is a nano second.
One of the perks of a cancer diagnosis, is you make plans. Plans that you’ve been putting off. Plans that take effort.
Last night, Mackenzi’s phone shut off. Google’s answer:
It may be as simple as turning it back on or plugging it in, but if that doesn’t work then the fix will take great effort.
…great effort…leave it to Google for life lessons…
Most things that are worth it take great effort.
It shouldn’t have taken cancer for me to put great effort into seeing my friends.
Life happened, we were busy, it wasn’t great timing, yada yada yada…but this year, I spent the summer and fall reconnecting with all my people - new, old, collegiate and the originals.
I drank too much wine, ruined expensive underwear with menopausal laughter (you’ll know when you know), and then cried myself to sleep after each trip.
You didn’t ask for my advice but … you know … cancer … indulge me.
Don’t wait for cancer. Put in the effort, buy that plane ticket, sleep on air mattresses, stay up too late, laugh until it hurts.
As much and as often as you can.
You may work your way into the 1%. You may someday fly only first class. You may work your way all the way to the top floor. But you should know. That you are already in the 1% where it really matters.
I hate the phrase “give 110%”. 1. Because it’s literally impossible and 2. Because that’s silly. Don’t give 100% to anything.
Give some to your careers. When you have a partner and a family, give a lot to them. But save a little. Always a little for your people. The people who built you. The people who held your hair back, the people who played hide and seek in the middle of the night, and went sledding on the Oval.
There are no guarantees in this life, so cherish and nurture those already standing in your corner, and then thank the Universe for having the foresight to criss cross your path with one another.
How firm thy friendship,
Juli - Mom
PS
To my friends from Bloomington, from Chillicothe, from Tennessee, from Indiana, from Alabama, from Ohio here’s to you! I am well aware that I stand firmly in the 1%.
Happiest of Thanksgivings.
And. Go Bucks! Nobody likes a cheater…
OH MY YES! Love all parts of this! Wise advice..... Enjoy your peeps whenever you can! ❤️
Mom